One of the features I have experienced within over 20 years of service in the United Methodist Church is the widespread use of misnomers. Similar to the words used in political spin in secular society, they appear in the names of political caucuses as well as within legal and operational discourse. Methodist Misnomers fall into three categories: antonyms, euphemisms, and dysphemisms. Here are a few. Perhaps you know of others. Enjoy!
ANTONYMS
| UM Word | Actual Meaning |
| Good News | Bad News |
| Confessing | Accusing |
| Reconciling | Agitating |
| Covenant | Schismatic |
| Amicable | Hateful |
| Next | Familiar |
| Central | Remote |
| Itinerant | Stationed |
| Apportionment | Assessment |
| Equitable | Minimum |
| Bureaucracy | Democracy |
EUPHEMISMS
| UM Word | Actual Meaning |
| Missional | Institutional |
| High Potential | Privileged |
| Gifts and Graces | Salary and Social Class |
| Transitional | Unemployed |
| Progressive | Liberal / Antinomian / Utopian |
| Inclusion | Assimilation |
| Evangelical | Conservative / Legalistic / Dystopian |
| Connectional | Hierarchal |
| Nimble | Autocratic |
| Leadership | Management |
| Director | Bureaucrat |
DYSPHEMISMS
| UM Word | Actual Meaning |
| Guaranteed | Earned |
| Burdensome | Ethical / Fair |
| Giving Unit | Human Being |
| Racial or Ethnic | Non-White Human Being |
| Segregated | Unique, Separate, or Specialized |
| Subsidized | Funded |
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